Does it Make YOU Uncomfortable?

I don’t know how to say it. I can’t seem to put into words everything that I’ve been experiencing and dwelling on the past few weeks. I wish I had the vocabulary of a friend of mine. He has the ability to pull out the most unique and refreshing word choices at a moments notice. But my limited and uncreative words will have to suffice for now.

“What am I referring to?” you might ask. I’m talking about a lot of things. Poverty. Water…or lack thereof. The H2O project. Sweatshops. Social justice. Solidarity. The common good. Peace. Hatred. Love. Ignorance. Understanding. Community. Empowerment. Action. All these things have pervaded my thoughts and spilled out into my conversations; they have enriched my world view and changed the way I live my life. These things have also made me uncomfortable and made those I’ve talked with uncomfortable as well.

“What are you wearing that bracelet for?” a coffee barista asks me as she rings up my pastry.

“I’m doing the H2O project. We give up all drinks except water for two weeks and the money we save by not buying juice, soda, coffee, etc we donate to an organization that provides clean water wells to developing countries,” I say all in one breath. It’s not the first time I’ve had to say this spiel. Apparently people are pretty curious about strange looking bright blue bracelets.

“Oh…I’m guessing you won’t be wanting any coffee to go with that pastry.”

I smile and ask for a water cup.

Coffee girl’s response was a fairly mild one compared to some of the reactions I’ve gotten in the last two weeks. When you’re at a bar, people notice right away if you’re not drinking, and they always want to know why. When I was asked why I wasn’t drinking, I replied with my usual H2O spiel. However, at a bar that is apparently a conversation killer as I soon found out. Sometimes people don’t know how to respond to something like that. Maybe it’s because when people go out to drink and be merry and a conversation comes up that puts them in contact with things that make them uncomfortable, they don’t like it. But I suppose this is a natural reaction for many. Who wants to dwell on poverty and exploitation in developing nations when you’re trying to have a little Friday night fun? It’s not like it’s a bad thing to want to talk about things that liven up a conversation like embarrassing stories or funny anecdotes. There’s a time and a place for everything. But what I’ve been grappling with is finding that balance between living an ordinary life and yet living in awareness and solidarity with those who live on under $2 a day.

One thing that I take away from the H2O project is a small feeling of solidarity. And when I say small I mean small. I could never pretend to have gone through the same experiences that one billion people on this planet face. I didn’t have to walk several miles to get my water, I didn’t have to share the same water source as a herd of cattle, I didn’t have to get treated for diarrhea or other water diseases. Heck, I only had to give up extra drinks like coffee and slurpees. I drank clean fresh water everyday and merely giving up the extras was more difficult than I realized. However, I felt a sense of sacrifice (hopefully experiencing even a fraction of the sacrifice that many face in getting clean water) and even that small amount was enough to change me. I never really understood what living in solidarity meant until now. Isn’t that ridiculous? And even then I don’t know that I will fully understand it until I have truly experienced and lived in poor or harsh conditions. This makes me uncomfortable because I realize how privileged we are to live in a developed nation and how complacent I have become in the comforts and pleasures of a middle class American. I now realize that anyone can give money to help poverty but nothing transforms one better than actually experiencing even a small part of it. So where does that leave me? I’m not really sure yet. It’s a journey that’s for sure and I hope to learn more, experience much more, and hopefully change myself and others along the way.

I have more to say. To be continued in Part II...

Yours truly,
a girl who dreams